In bloom

And when you finally have all the time you wanted for yourself; and when you're thinking of doing something which would pass off as something - anything at all - you go blank. Yes, you feel part of some Lonely Hearts Club Band and you're the [L] they gesture all the while and you're the one they call Freak/Creep and you also manage to get yourself under-rated and ostracized. And then you become a suicide blonde and you decide to pull out your hair; seven strands at a time. You plan to make yourself better - improve yourself, you little shit. And now we're going down and out and morbid. Sulk; you're a dry leaf. Cry your nose out and cut out the heart bleeding stuff. You should wipe the sweat off your soul and let it meet its mate.

Someone stop and tell me this is going fine. A frown can be forgiven, but I hate raised eyebrows. Stop acting like you're already there where I have been. Am I talking just a little too loud?

So you miss Senko. Ah, who doesn't? No, this is not a sad ending.

Let me tell you a story about points and conclusions. I don't even know why I'm doing this. How do you express incapability with the use of this language and its words? I want lemonade, okay? Bring me a tall glass as well - where else will I store my vomit? Who has been naughty? Yeah, this surely is a dream. Scream, will you? Axl, come on up. He needed to find a way cure his pain. He is still looking; while they form and split up. Scott, you remember how good you were? I need a song! Groan.

She turned away, what was she looking at? She was a sour girl the day that she met me.

And I'm smiling now. [:)] I'm moving my body with the groove and I'm finger dancing on this white keyboard. My ear itched, so I hit it hard. They pulled your ears while teaching you the good stuff? That is why they don't need your education! And I love that feeling which makes the world go round and makes people do things best; I've talked about that previously. I'm yawning and rubbing and thinking. Oh yeah, I'm gonna love reading this post again. I wonder how long have I been at it. And yet again, Blogger does it again - all is good, all is calm.

I noticed I don't have anything nice to say about myself; but hey; I'm no monument am I? I'm all right, will do, have done, going well.

In bloom.

And the tedious process of thinking in long, coherent sentences used to be a frequent feature in my mind until the coldness and the obscurity took over me and made me my abrupt self. I don't mind it really, and this mention wasn't necessary either. Bleeargh. Freeooow!

Let me do a quick spell check - you know why it won't take long.

But remember, I will always love myself better than both of you. Whatever you say or hide will never make me understand the bad, bad ill-effects of selfishness and negligence and ignorance and kinkiness. Dung. Eat it. Try slugs, and wash it down with a little sea water. The sea breeze has an unusual smell. And now I have to leave you waiting and wanting for more, for this friend of mine; who is not a sweet child, is in need of my presence around there. Somewhere over the rainbow, I will ride my bike and get wet. Okay, I'm done.

Nevermind

Something had occurred just at wrong time…when it actually shouldn’t have at all…the people in the pond were gaping at his wild hairdo...and then the dog nearly got under the skateboard...I heard a yelp...I turned around to watch the moon...which had transformed into a white Pac-Man...it ate the bananas...and the crocodile wept tears of joy...thus, I became King of Mars...but, still, he continues to humor me…the seven gorillas pounded their heads against their bottoms…she married herself off to his broken fountain pen…and then came the runt…who shouted at the trash can for imparting fragrance…they looked away, for they were expressionless…while the bowl ran off with the fork…and the torpedo decided to run for President…the real reason for all this chaos was invented pretty much accurately by the carpenter’s great grandfather…who was a grandmaster as well…and then we all came out of our baskets to explain why the battle between the two great Wars was justified…while she screamed her heart away…and her eyes swam so bravely…and that is how it happened in the end and after all - oh, nevermind.

Here

This is when you’re happy and content.
This is when don’t have much to complain about.
This is when you thank whoever responsible for letting you be a part of this real world.
This is when you know that it is a beautiful day.
This is when you start living a life.
Your life – realized and acknowledged

And this is when you have nothing to blog about.
And you lose track and you lose touch and you run outta ideas.
Like I have
Like I had, rather
But now I needed a post
And here it is, or there it was

I’m back; it had been awhile
Hello

No comments?
Ah

Today's love

Check this out - My cool, all-gyan quotes - Came up with them myself - Do read them if you're into the 'love' thing...or not, oh well. Don't be offended - for you, love will forever remain wonderful n' all that shit you call it.

'Love' here is referred to that serious relationship a boy and girl start having and then plan their marriage soon enough...they get mushy and corny and dopey and totally and madly and deeply blah blah...chill, don't get entangled in this love crap - Flirt, enjoy, move on, goodbye. You have lotsa time to settle down finally with a lover you can screw anytime and every time. On that note, lets all go yay.

Now, I give you my cool, all-gyan quotes…

"Falling in love is the last step you take, when you're so froogin' bored of your sick life."

"Boredom makes you fall in love - that loser (he or she) you 'love' isn't all that bright - snap outta it!"

"The love you talk about is just a social disease the youth of today has given birth to, and spread around - It's an epidemic!"

Neat, huh?

This was then, when I was a bit of an idiot. What rotten non-sensical crap; I didn't know what I was talking about in the above lines. Yes, that was typed and prepared a few months ago, when it had not happened to me. And now this is what I have to say about it now; after it has happened to me.

I feel good. Yes, the music is playing ever so significantly, an important role in adding to my happiness. But there is something else as well, and I know I will never be able to put it to words. It's special. It's crazy. It's so simple. So I will put it very simply. Woohoo and we all jump with joy. I want all of you to smile, because right now, I'm feeling heavy metal. I need you to turn up your music a little louder and enjoy it better, because right now, I'm in a great mood. I hope this will help in coming up with a postable post. May I please make that happy smiley? [:)] There.

I could not believe that it could’ve been this perfect.

You ought to fall in there. You must try it. It's wonderful. Yes, you're thinking, "Get a grip, dude; you're sounding all mushy." But that mushy feeling is really about the happiness, because that is what makes you smile, makes you laugh, makes you go woohoo, makes you feel like dee keeng of dee world. Hahaha. This is awesome. I love this post until now. So far so good. [:)]

The Notebook is an amazing book.

'Right here waiting' by Richard Marx has got to be the most beautiful song ever written and composed. Your heart and soul become ecstatic when you get to hear that song. [:)]

Everything is just so happy. What a wonderful world. The sun shines and stars twinkle; the sky beams and the moon gleams; and peacocks dance and kids prance. Oh, what a happy life. It happened last winter and it changed me forever.

And so love happened to me and I was complete. I felt learned and mature – responsible and eager to prove my love, my life and myself. Love is grand, love is lovely, and I love love. Trust me, if you haven't yet felt like this; it's plain sad. It's such a positive and powerful feeling...nothing ever goes wrong and you're walking around with this aura of total correctness and endless mindless possibility. Things click into place automatically; and mechanically; and artistically? The only disease that can harm you is what you're already suffering from, and it ain't bad at all. You think better and you think about more useful stuff (like this post, in my case). You feel like nothing can stop you from getting at what you're wanting. It's not about over-confidence, it's about having this sensation, that yeah, "it's all good, it's all about me, and I can do this, of course." So then, all goes well and nice and good and it all works out great for you. You can touch the sky, and if you're not gaining in height and it seems far away; you can then make it fall towards you and then comfortably reach out for it. You can look at the stars and make them shine and dance for you. The moon will become a Pac-Man and will sing 'thinking about you' by that angel Norah Jones. What a sweet song. [:)]

So children, it's nothing to make fun of, it's nothing to shy away from, and there is no need to try and escape it. It's a rocking and a jazzy feeling, and it gives you all sorts of ecstasies and highs, and even orgasms, if you can work at it well enough. So feel it and enjoy it. If you are one of those stone hearted, cold monsters who don't give a damn; I pity you. Grow up and wake up. Smell the coffee and make sure you smell good. It's about your own happiness, then why not go ahead and feel it? And fall in it? And remain there, in a world of your own, where things don't go wrong and nothing is bad - it's all good - it's all good - it's our love - it's our love.

Hey, I'm just a pleasantly happy guy in love with this emotion called Music. That's just it. That's really it. I love you; I love you; I love you; you're the music I listen to. [:)]

Hee hee hee?

Hee hee hee.

Pure Narcotic

Porcupine Tree - Steven Wilson - He wrote this beautiful song - How?! I wish I knew. I can just totally relate to this one.

You keep me waiting
You keep me alone in a room full of friends
You keep me hating
You keep me listening to the Bends

No amount of pointless days
Can make this go away

You have me on my knees
You have me listless and deranged
You have me in your pocket
You have me distant and estranged

No narcotics in my brain
Can make this go away

I'm sorry that, I'm sorry that I'm not like you
I worry that I don't act the way you'd want me to

You find me wanting
You find me bloodless but inspired
You find me out
You find me hallucinating fire

No narcotics in my brain
Can make this go away

I'm sorry that, I'm sorry that I'm not like you
I worry that I don't act the way you'd like me to

Have we ever been here before?
Running headlong at the floor
Leave me dreaming on a railway track
Wrap me up and send me back

And there is this piece of music which plays after the second chorus and in the end - It's heavenly. Fills you up with happiness. Makes you smile and makes you feel good about everything. This song is so perfect. It's sweet. And I'm sounding so bloody mushy; what is wrong with me? Oh, well. No matter. Read the song. You should download it. Enjoy yourself.

Hello

I thought I'd drop by and say hello. So I did.

When you type something for people to read, you're saying it to them and speaking it out. There we go; my motive justified.

Freaky soliloquy

The thing is that once you have something to type about, you can just go on. What's missing in my posts is a basic idea. It's very cool to say that you have a blog about nothing at all and that it is the craziest thing that could have happened to you; but it's a bitch when you gotta actually put in some crap to make it worth reading. I mean, come on; there are people out there actually sitting on their thrones and reading this very paragraph, and THIS is all I got to show to them? A series of confused thoughts and freaky soliloquy? I'm bad at this.

I love the word 'freakheaded'

Froog it. Never get distracted. It's the worst fault ever. Especially when you're concentrating on a flow of thought and you're on a mission to come up with a reader-friendly post. Please people, I hope you're all ready to go through more of this post. Oh, froog you all, who cares if you don't anyway? I'll just be happy to have this on my blog. I like the font I use, and the backdrop. The colours look so pretty. The blog has style. The coldness and the steadiness with which the posts have been typed...I mean woah, I will applaud the postman. Just plain smooth, man. Good shit, dude. Uh huh.

The only way to fix it is to flush it all away.

I hate the brainwashing process...it's so bloody tedious, and the most irritating part of it is that you never know when you're successful, and when you're supposed to stop with the operation. It's boring. I'm boring. This post is boring. So let it end.

A downish mood

Well obviously, I'm not feeling too good about myself at the moment. So this entry here is an exit for all the elements of disillusionment and negativity that are trying to bring me down. Ah, even my system is against me today. There are things going around inside me that are doing their best to make the frown appear. Wrinkles? Dimples? Smile.

Yeah, I know it's a wonderful world n' all that. The sun shines and stars twinkle; the sky beams and the moon gleams; and peacocks dance and kids prance. Oh, what a happy life. Yes, of course. But, right now; it's brooding time. That, and contemplation. Time to sulk, and sulk well and proper. Make it sound good. Yes. The flow of random thought? Sure. Always welcome. How else do you think is all this being typed? Lookie here and we have something to post now. And I'm feeling better about everything already. Hmm...writing/typing is surely the best way to let it out. And I haven't even started on that downish mood yet. I will go on with what we're at; because letting it all out is the motive here, and a pretty post like this is the motivation. Was. Now, you see it. I saw it gradually finish. I witnessed this being processed and typed and thought about and considered. Yes, I've seen it all; I was here first. And now we're on a roll! What was the point we were talking about anyway?

Ah, the downish mood. Yeah, I feel low. It happens sometimes. No, it has nothing to do with the incident of the cat getting spayed. I just feel bad about myself. You know what I'm talking about? You're just sitting there and feeling like shit. Well, okay not that bad; but you get me, don't you? I think it's my face. It's dry. I feel dry. Ouch. Stretch. Or maybe it's because of my hair. Yes, I haven't shampooed in a week. Hmm...how stupid these problems sound. Yes, that's not it then.

Anyway, whatever it is, it's now WAS; because that lowly feeling that brought about the downish mood has left me alone. And now, I'm empty again. Wow. Ah, the contentment returns and all is well. Thanks for listening to me. The up of this new mood has belittled and defeated the downish mood. It's all about feeling nice about yourself and finding a way to let it out. And there we go; now we're all glad we went through this. So, the solution is - To create a blog on Blogger here and let it all out. All hail gravity; makes everything go down, down, down, down.

Crush 'em

Bludgened thess
The darling test
A tragic prick
With mingled grief

It died inside
The fallen tree
Some licked too soon
And hatched the cock

The goof who spayed
It stuck up straight
My single hump
An ouched grimace

He took his pain
And banged the balls
A noble run
Goodbye good job

Read it once? Now read it again - It's about getting it smashed and torturing it. Think low, think down, think ouch. Have fun. Ha!

Happy shoes

I thought I'd try adding a picture to my next post. Just to see if my post looks any prettier. I could add a video in here as well, or a fancy link to something elaborate. But however nice these extra decorations may be, it's always the text form of a description that appeals to the inner eye, or even the third eye for that grey matter. And here we go into another fit of dottiness. I will talk about the picture I've put up now. It's an album cover? Nope. They're feet. My yellowish-orange shoes. What a colour for a pair of shoes, and that too a left and a right. I love this pic. I think it would make an excellent desktop wallpaper. You're allowed to save it and flash it on your screen. Ah, so you'll have RBK and Converse smiling silently at you while you work away on your system - sweet. But I feel that is a decent pic - artistically taken n' all that. Photography is an art they say, but the creativity never flows. Why do they capture images already been captured thoullions of times? Get a buzz, come alive, feel everything around you, feel great about it, and then the ideas swiftly slide into the correct place - Your head. Anyway, these shoes are very excited about being put up on the blog. At least they'll stop pestering me with stinkboots.

Always out of reach you are

Always in my thoughts you are? Yes, I do really think I think too much. Hey you, don't cut out my paper heart; I ain't dying, you see. Anyway, the time we spent was innocent; we just forgot to mention we're only good friends. And if I thought it was the start of something beautiful...big mistake.

It's amazing how songs can sometimes sum up exactly how you're feeling. It's so perfect how well you can relate to a certain song during an uncertain phase of your life. That's why I tell everyone - Music is really it. That's it. Music. It's what everyone can understand and communicate to. Music. Pouring out anything inside and explaining hidden things, which we ourselves fail to, or avoid accepting. Porcupine Tree, my favourite band these days came up with a song called "start of something beautiful" - Woah. You ought to go listen to it. It's got lyrics all of you can comprehend. We all go through that part of out lives where we're confused about a person...a relationship...a feeling...it's a happy feeling though. Blissful. Totally. But confusing. Even frustrating. Oh well, what's the fun without the pain right? So I guess it's nice to have that mixed feeling of confusion and surety. I love you, I love you, I love you; you're as beautiful as the music I listen to.

I'm in love with this sensation called music.